Stupid Is as Stupid Does...

Here's one for the stupid file.

Ted Walker of Auckland, NZ's largest city, has enjoyed his morning run through Cornwall Park for 15 years. On July 26 he ran past a cow that had recently calved. She attacked him, knocking him to the ground, kicking & head-butting him. For his troubles she left Ted with a broken arm and bruising over his body.

"I was absolutely terrified and scared witless," he says. "I thought it was all over. I quite literally thought she was going to kill me."

Docile cows - because humans ate their babies...

The area has signs up to caution visitors to stay away from cows during the calving season. Ted claims he always stayed away from cows but this one was on his running path. He wants to warn everyone to stay away from cows with calves.

Damn, townies.

Listen up, people: NEVER, EVER GET BETWEEN OR NEAR A MOTHER AND HER YOUNG!!! And that goes for all species...

This writer learned the lesson well in his younger years when a cow showed him how good a high jumper he could be as he cleared the stockyard top railing with a good six inches to spare. But he blames his farmer boss for that episode. Always know where your escape hatch is!

Message to Ted: find somewhere else to run! Avoid a herd of calving cows. A bull is far tamer.

How townies - in New Zealand or elsewhere - have forgotten their rural past. Don't expect the livestock to make allowances for you. You have to make allowances for them - you're supposed to be smarter after all...